Baby!

Some flowers I picked today :)

In case you missed it... we're pregnant!! It's hard to believe but we're so grateful! Blake and I will be married for three years in July so, we feel like this is perfect timing for a little addition to the madness. We've shared vacations, plenty of moving, new friends, new churches, new everything. It's been a blessing to discover my role as a wife and even to enjoy an actual home for a year so far! We were sort of trying, if you must know! I was trying to avoid children for a little while longer because the whole process just freaks me out to be honest. I mean, a woman's body goes through SO many changes and that scares me! I'm learning to accept it now since it's all so exciting and start picturing myself as a mom. Weird! 

Blake has wanted children from day one so he has definitely been my biggest cheerleader! He will be the best dad! More on that later, that topic needs its own blog post don't you think? Before I actually took a pregnancy test I felt the Lord saying to me, "Yes Caroline, you are pregnant and you're going to have to learn to trust me." I have definitely struggled with trust over the past three years because we have moved so many times, we've both had to change jobs, churches, friends, etc. Even growing up, since I was the youngest of five sisters, as they each moved away I felt like the Lord was calling me to put all of my trust and security in HIM. Not sisters, not family, not friends, not food, not ______. You name it. Even since we've moved to White House my heart just feels like, "ok, Lord where are you taking us next?" He always takes care of us though... He is so good and definitely trustworthy.

For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. Ephesians 2:10

more flowers that I picked today.

12 weeks
Something is changing I think!

I really haven't felt many symptoms yet! Maybe a little bloating as seen above? I am so thankful that I haven't been sick; I've only felt queazy a few times, especially when driving on crazy roads in Panama! I do feel pretty sleepy from time to time, my stomach feels empty every two hours, and my hips feel swimmy, but that's pretty much it. I haven't felt any babies movin' around but I have felt some little cramps... something is growing in there! It's so surreal! I keep thinking about how much of miracle this all is. Our next appointment is on June 8th so I can't wait to find out more about this little one... we don't find out the sex until July. CAN'T WAIT.ALSO... please don't be one of those people who asks, "do you want a boy or a girl?" We do not have a preference and if we did then you should slap us in the face! Seriously. That's just crazy. Have you seen my niece and nephews? We are so fortunate to live fifteen minutes away from all these chubby cheeks and there is NO WAY that I could choose one over the other. They are so precious I can't even contain myself. See what I mean? Check out the fall pictures I took of them here. Again, I say this all the time... children are not accessories. I know it will be difficult to not get too excited over little baby things but that's just what they are... things. I do not ever want my child to feel like an accessory. I pray that I can love my children the way that Christ loves us. We don't deserve it. We can't obtain it. 

On a selfish note haha... do you see that curly hair up there? See, after we got married and I was on good ol' birth control, my hair decided that it would not curl anymore. Not fair!! So, I'm hoping that somewhere in all of these pregnancy hormones that my curls will find their way back. Please? That would be wonderful! 

13 weeks

13 weeks

As far as a nursery goes... the lovely homeowners before us decorated it pretty nicely. We like it but we'll have to change that blue wall if "it" is a girl. Pretty cool, huh? We think so! (Of course they did not leave the furniture)  We have so much to be thankful for!