Motivation (Part One)

It was February of 2011 and I was facing one of the most challenging conversations I've had to this day. I worked at a specialist's office in Hendersonville, TN for a few short months and discovered that some people in this world just don't care about following any set of moral standards. I was asked and refused to comply with many of my job requirements that would cause me to break the law. I had never been under someone's employment that asked me to do so many illegal things. Word got around to my boss that I wasn't quite the right fit for this office. He sat me down, red faced and white knuckled, and among many hurtful (and loud) statements, he proclaimed, "I respect what you're trying to do with the church and all, helping people, but it seems like you can't help me anymore." He was referencing the fact that Blake and I were in the ministry, but that I could no longer be an effective employee now that I was refusing to comply with all the illegal tasks he ordered us to do.

I froze in shock and hurt.

You know what upset me most about this converstation? Sure, I was trembling as I held back tears because he was so cruel, I knew that I was losing my job, and had no idea where to turn next financially. However, the moment where I lost sight of my circumstances was when he said, "helping people."

I really think that this man saw Christianity as merely another good effort of nice people, helping people. I was broken in two. My face couldn't be any more red. My words were silenced by uncontrollable shaking. I couldn't speak.

Did Jesus just come to this earth to pat people on the back and fix their problems? No! The whole Old Testament would be so lifeless if it was just about people messing up and an all powerful genie making everything better so they could be happy. It's all pointing to Jesus. It's all about his name. Jesus came to bringing dead people to life, for HIS glory.

This series of events led me to ask myself, "what are my motives as a believer?"

My boss and I had multiple conversations about faith, grace, and the difference between Christianity and other religions but he probably saw me as just a "do-gooder." His motivation was money, he made sure we knew it every day. My motivation was to show God's love in my workplace... of course, I didn't do that perfectly. But his words kept haunting me for weeks. Does the world really just see religion as simply a means to "help" others or ourselves? When we look at God as some genie in the sky that is there to fix all our problems, misfortunes, and to give us happiness, we cheapen the Gospel. This is a very man-centered view of God. It's amazing to me that through all this mess, God then provided a wonderful opportunity for me to work at Dr. Cohen's office. Not only did he provide a job for me, my sister was a pediatrician downstairs. Our friendship was able to grow in a unique way before we moved to Florida. What a blessing. What a big God. But there's more.

Were all these events taking place for my happiness? No. It's not about my little bank account or my little job.

All of life points us to a bigger story unfolding with the centerpiece being God's glory!

God changed my motivation very quickly once he revealed to me that sometimes, I'm like my old boss. Sometimes my motives are money, selfishness, happiness, helping people, and not kingdom work.

A motive can be defined as something that causes a person to act in a certain way, do a certain thing, or their incentive.

My prayer is that the Holy Spirit will help me check my motives. "My biggest problem is that I live under the illusion that I can do anything I put my mind to while I give lip service to needing God's wisdom. I need to know at the heart level, I cannot do anything gracefully to God's glory without the guidance and help of the Holy Spirit."- Goria Furman 

Thankfully, He promises to give us wisdom! "If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him." James 1:5

I don't want to be merely following the law, doing nice things for people. Christ's example empowers me to seek out the lost, seek out people who aren't like me at all, disciple others, and ultimately be about his glory. And need a whole lotta' grace and forgiveness. Gloria Furman (again, she's awesome) put it this way, "The superior power of affection and devotion to Jesus can do what no limits of the world or other temporality of God's earthly gifts could ever do." 

Transform us from the inside out, Lord!!

Part two will follow soon. Thank you for reading!